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Self-Less Women
We are born into a sea of pink.
Praised for being pretty, beautiful or cute;
rarely for being strong, tough or smart.
We are brainwashed from infancy.
Come adulthood we embrace the falsities:
“I'm born to be a mom!” “I’m here to nurture!” “I'm self-less.”
I am self-less.
Less than those I care for.
Proven by my pay check (showing I'm worthy of 76.5 cents per dollar).
Proven by the expectation that I work full-time, parent 1.5 children,
take care of my husband (wink, wink),
keep the house presentable for company, volunteer for my church or local animal shelter,
and stay hot— all without complaint.
Like jugglers or plate spinners it’s quite magical how we keep afloat.
Perpetuating the myths and
burdening our daughters with these ideals.
We're shaking our money makers,
doing squats to get a thigh gap
and yearning to look like the girls in the magazines
and we're bombarded with imagery that tells us
being desired is a natural feminine need.
While surrounded by unrealistic fabrications of a lingering patriarchy,
we strive for misogynistic standards of beauty
and we achieve desire.
But desire is not respect!
Sadly we've become martyrs against our own cause.
Throwing shade at other women:
Suburban moms, Mother Earth moms and
Choose-not-to-be moms,
Skinny bitches and "have another donut" ladies,
we're unknowingly complicit in our own demise.
The struggle should not be against one another!
Our sky high heels need to smash the glass ceiling
Making room for other women to embrace positions of power.
Support other women; quit judging.
Reconsider the smiling great grandmother,
and that palpable joy when her husband of 52 years passed.
Empathize with the loss and freedom registering on her face.
Learn from Gertrude, and Frannie, and Elizabeth.
Two decades from now we shouldn’t be nearing retirement
trapped in a life we never realized we never wanted,
watching our daughters add another spinning plate!
We were born into a sea of pink,
but we can change the expectations.
Women can be strong and beautiful,
smart and kind, tough and nurturing.
It isn’t an either or.
Choosing self is not selfish.
We are more.
Don’t settle for less.
Trina Zuyderduyn, 2014
We are born into a sea of pink.
Praised for being pretty, beautiful or cute;
rarely for being strong, tough or smart.
We are brainwashed from infancy.
Come adulthood we embrace the falsities:
“I'm born to be a mom!” “I’m here to nurture!” “I'm self-less.”
I am self-less.
Less than those I care for.
Proven by my pay check (showing I'm worthy of 76.5 cents per dollar).
Proven by the expectation that I work full-time, parent 1.5 children,
take care of my husband (wink, wink),
keep the house presentable for company, volunteer for my church or local animal shelter,
and stay hot— all without complaint.
Like jugglers or plate spinners it’s quite magical how we keep afloat.
Perpetuating the myths and
burdening our daughters with these ideals.
We're shaking our money makers,
doing squats to get a thigh gap
and yearning to look like the girls in the magazines
and we're bombarded with imagery that tells us
being desired is a natural feminine need.
While surrounded by unrealistic fabrications of a lingering patriarchy,
we strive for misogynistic standards of beauty
and we achieve desire.
But desire is not respect!
Sadly we've become martyrs against our own cause.
Throwing shade at other women:
Suburban moms, Mother Earth moms and
Choose-not-to-be moms,
Skinny bitches and "have another donut" ladies,
we're unknowingly complicit in our own demise.
The struggle should not be against one another!
Our sky high heels need to smash the glass ceiling
Making room for other women to embrace positions of power.
Support other women; quit judging.
Reconsider the smiling great grandmother,
and that palpable joy when her husband of 52 years passed.
Empathize with the loss and freedom registering on her face.
Learn from Gertrude, and Frannie, and Elizabeth.
Two decades from now we shouldn’t be nearing retirement
trapped in a life we never realized we never wanted,
watching our daughters add another spinning plate!
We were born into a sea of pink,
but we can change the expectations.
Women can be strong and beautiful,
smart and kind, tough and nurturing.
It isn’t an either or.
Choosing self is not selfish.
We are more.
Don’t settle for less.
Trina Zuyderduyn, 2014